Talkin Christmas Blues - Roger Salloom
Talking Christmas Blues, copyright Oct. 25, 2018, words and music by Roger Salloom

Not too fast.

Hey! It’s Christmas Time but I don’t know what to do.
Actually I was thinking of calling on you.

Let me give you picture and verse
Before things get much worse.

My brother can’t talk to me and won’t tell me why
My sister’s in New Zealand , not even trying.

I’m in Massachusetts wondering if I’m a danger to myself
Yet, I still have those precious family photos up on the kitchen shelf.
Chorus: I Got the Talking Christmas Blues

Nearly all my friends owe me money, so that keeps them away
It all works out for the best, I’d forgive their debts,
But not sure how to say it.

Jimmy’s in the clinic, Phyllis is in there too
They used to listen to Fannie Lou Hammer and Rinky Dinky Doo

Uncle Frank can’t remember his birthday, Aunt Joan won’t cook anymore.
They shut off her stove and changed the locks on her doors.

Booboo turned 23 and they put him away
For stealing wallets, changing his name

Frank’s getting a lawyer ,Deedee called a shrink,
I got a toothache and don’t know what to think.

I Got the Talking Christmas Blues

Uncle Joe’s not talking to Dale, Lonnie’s not talking to Curley
Phyllis threw up at her wedding
And I go to be early.

Maybe I need a fish tank, or a parrot who can talk
Or a good doggie who’ll take me for long thoughtful walks.

I Got the Talking Christmas Blues

My friend down in Texas just stole and crashed his third Lexus….
Btw what is the plural of Lexus, Lexi?

He used to live in California
Where he had a girlfriend who’d do anything for yeh

Maybe I’ll invite them over the week after Christmas so there’s no expectations
… forget about our crises and the state of the nation.
…give ‘em a reason to get back together for the cross country trip.


Cheryl wants to sell her body and give away her kids
My brother won’t stop crying but can’t tell me what he did

Benny likes to steal and then carry the purse,
and around sundown everyone gets even worse

I Got the Talking Transplant Blues

They’re all good people deep inside
But they’re in a crisis nearly all of the time.

Well, actually, This seems to be as happy as I get nowadays,
so Merry, or Happy or Whatever it is you celebrate.

Love yourselves as much as you might
Do your best and to all a good night.

…I think we gotta accept things as they are…life sure goes by fast.
Talk to you again another time….
See you around, this is Roger, well, at least, that is what they have been calling me for years.

That’s probably going to continue.